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Thursday, June 21, 2012

Stay Classy



A Motel, Ocean Springs, Mississippi.

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Really?

The place only has three floors. The longest ride you can take on this elevator is less than 30 seconds...I timed it. How hell-bent on destruction do you have to be that you can't go half a minute without scratchin' somethin' up?

At least none of it's intelligible. Given the time constraints, these scrapes already suggest a disturbing amount of pre-planning.*

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That I can understand...I want to punch myself in the face for being here too.

This is what happens when you make your travel plans on the fly.

It's a smoker at least.

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Of course the pleasure of smoking indoors is offset by the fear of being attacked at night by bed bugs with herpes.

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If I didn't have my own bathroom I'd think I was back in Kings Cross.

Keep in mind...this is just a regular old room though. You can swank it up.

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19 comments:

  1. Eeeurgh. I haven't seen anything that rough outside of India or England.

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  2. Eeeek. Hotel jacuzzis must be the skeeziest things on the planet.

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    1. I'm just disappointed the bed dosen't have one of those coin operated shakers.

      Martha did ask me to see if they have a frequent stayer points system.

      Delete
  3. Eww. Looks like one of those places where you'd feel the urge to wipe your feet on the way OUT.
    Hope you didn't/don't have to stay there too long...

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  4. I am thankfully home.

    At least it wasn't as bad as the suicide room the Baton Rouge Motel 6 tried to put me in.

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  5. Thats kinda how I imagine motels over there, you don't do much to shatter cliches dude. Never been in a bad hotel thankfully, though do tend to stick to B and B's and such.

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  6. Have you not seen American restaurants on tv or in the movies...people can't eat an order of cheese sticks without being checked on six times. How long do you think those people would last in a room with cigarette burns and a cracked mirror?

    These types of places exist to support local small businesses...real small...owner-operator types.

    If a hotel is flying a corporate flag...it's rUn according to corporate guidelines and is safe...like the crisp, comfy, soulless Hampton Inns I usually stay in.

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    1. Surely them sorts would find hotels though, right, not motels? Motels is for your seedy types holding out with a shotgun and a knife wounds they just need a couple of days to heal up a little better before that drive to the border, with the bag of cash.

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    2. I forgot to add: You are really working that 'last coconut in the shop' hairdo this year ain't ya?

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    3. Thechnically, I reckon, the place is a hotel...all the rooms are inside. What you want is a roadside inn...a real Motel.

      There's still plenty of them around...I'll get you some pictures.

      And stop hatin'.

      Delete
  7. In such pleasant surroundings why would you not want to splash out on a Jacuzzi Special?

    Never has the phrase night night and mind the bed bugs don't bite seemed so appropriate

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    1. Sharron even though I'm home now...every time a hair moves on my head Im certain it's the bed bugs.

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  8. I know where the 2013 southern swingers convention is this year. Nothing like a public hot tub "ass soup" anyone.

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  9. I know a woman who briefly had a job which involved cleaning out the jacuzzis in a gym. She told me that a thick layer of yellow liquidised human fat builds up over days and is left coating the tiles once the water is drained away. It was her special task to scrape it off with a spatula.

    You may be able to take a tiny amount of consolation that you didn't try and cheer yourself up with a nice soak in their 'In Room' option. You'd still be washing the yellow sludge out of your hair.

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    Replies
    1. Oh lord...that is beyond it.

      I bet it was a brief job.

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  10. So, it's 1992 and I'm really excited because the BBC is sending me to Little Rock as a producer for the Presidential election programme. Unfortunately, the local BBC fixer (from DC) is steaming mad about London sending over a producer instead of letting her boss it all, so, while the rest of the team gets to stay in a pretty snazzy-looking hotel where all the action is, I mysteriously end up in a motel way out in North Little Rock. I’ve only ever stayed in worse hotels here in England (Birmingham, specifically). Your photos reminded me of it – and, believe me, that’s not a good thing. I was going to insist on a move, but I was too busy, and, besides, found myself enjoying the conversations with cab drivers on the long rides to and from civilisation – learned a hell of a lot more about the States from them than I did from my journalist colleagues. Despite being a bit of a skinflint, I’ve never stayed in a really cheap hotel – anywhere - for 20 years: after three nights in little Rock I’d seen enough upholstery stains, cigarette burns and dirt-grimed enamel to last a lifetime. Breakfast was good, though.

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    Replies
    1. Do them heathin's in Little Rock get you some grits at least?

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